I Make My Own Sunshine

Dress, Forever 21 ($15)// Necklace, Macy's ($5)// Flats, Target ($6)// Ring, Amy O Jewelry (Chictopia Reward)

As soon as I started walking, I knew something was wrong. The slam of the trunk door was unnervingly final. I looked down at my hands.

Notebook, highlighter, camera, phone...something very important was missing.



You know you're in the right mindset for school to start when you lock your keys in your trunk...I feel like I get into the most stereotypical unfortunate situations. First dropping my phone down a storm drain in the spring, now locking my keys in the car...

But I've met the kindest people through these mishaps. One was a complete stranger who donated hours of his day to help me fish my phone out. Today was a nice park ranger who pried the door open with a fancy set of "secret" tools.

And through all of my emotional debacles, you guys have been seriously awesome to me. Thank you. We had a nice chat last week and now both of us feel much more at peace. We're both beginning new chapters of our lives--he his freshman year of college, me my senior year of high school. But we're equipped to face the life's challenges with the assurance that we have a friend in each other.




"Gosh darn it! We forgot to make a wish!" Candace exclaimed a few moments after we witnessed the shooting star.

"Ah! Oh no!" I sputtered dramatically, "Let's make one now!"

It usually takes me an eternity to make a decision. But this time my heart reached a conclusion as quickly as the silvery light had streaked by.

I wish he and I could be friends again.

I'm beginning to believe that it's coming true. Like for many things, only time will tell.



'Tis the last batch of senior photos...for now hehe. I'd like to be able to snap a few shots with my violin. I'm also looking into investing in a zoom or portrait lens.

The dress is one I happened upon at Forever 21 about a month ago. It would be a perfect formal dance dress, but personally I've never enjoyed the dance scene much. In my last narrative about the last night of cross country camp, I realized I should've written: The flames were dancing...while we weren't.

Sigh. Just another to add to my collection of formal dresses--each time I stumble upon a bargain, I snap it up. I've amassed a total of three formal dresses for under $15 each that I've yet to wear out. Shhh, don't tell about my clothes collector habits (;



Surprisingly, I've no tales of shooting stars or any intentions of waxing philosophical today. It's the last day of summer for me--back to the swing of school, cross country, and orchestra. Often times I feel deeply unsettled before the start of school. Nothing life-changing happened. I didn't do anything remotely extraordinary. A couple thoughts I remember lamenting last year.

But for some reason, this summer is different.


"Now that I think about it Lily, this summer wasn't that great," My best friend said thoughtfully in the car as we embarked on a last summer adventure.

"I think part of it is that we expect so much out of it. When we have such high expectations, it's too easy to fall short."

Every year there a few things I can't check off my summer to-do list. This year, for example, I had planned to make two covers over the summer, but I only completed one. I had hoped to road trip to observe breathtaking meteor showers. And like always, I had hoped to do something life-changing.

But instead, this summer my family drove hundreds of miles in pursuit of my future at various colleges. Instead, this summer I played at my English and History teachers' wedding. This summer, I ate fried zucchini. This summer, I told my best guy friend that I had feelings for him. This summer, I learned more about who I am at a leadership conference. This summer, I ran thirteen miles without stopping. This summer, I saw a shooting star. This summer, I geared up for my final, terrifying, exhilarating year of high school.

This summer, I lived. 

I may not be around as much now. I may not be able to stalk *cough* read your blogs as closely. I may not be able to reply to every comment. But I promise to keep you updated. I may go poof! sporadically these upcoming months because of college applications, but I promise to be back.

I promise to come back with a vengeance.

Until then, my friends.

27 comments

  1. I'm glad you had a good talk with him :) new chapters in life require a whole different wet of attitude! Just go with the flow and see what the future brings you!

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  2. Lovely dress!


    Yellow Blog
    In need of a blog design makeover? I can help you!
    http://yellowblog.storenvy.com

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  3. You are sunshine here, and you shine beautifully with this gorgeous dress and your exceptional style. Pretty smile and cute hairstyle as well. Not only do you shine, but you also sparkle with those golden glittery flats. Technically, the sun is a star; so you both shine and sparkle (as stars do) like the Sun! :)

    Outside of fashion, good luck to you in your studies and in just living life. I wish you the best. Remain strong!

    johnbmarine.blogspot.com

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  4. Pretty dress😍😍

    Http://ayudamayanthi.blogspot.com

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  5. You can never have enough pretty dresses and this one was a steal!

    xoxo Jackie
    http://somethingaboutthatthing.blogspot.com

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  6. Definitely a summer to remember. Glad you two had a chance to talk it out before moving on. You are looking really good btw! Hope u have a great senior year babe!
    Fang Ting
    ftashion

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  7. Don't worry, I collect formal dresses that I never wear too! Love your voice within your blog... It's great because I can totally relate to your teenage mishaps. Shall we keep in contact, Lily? Share our Senior Swag together?
    Hugs & Kisses,
    Olivia

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  8. This is extremely beautiful =)

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  9. Good luck with the applications :) Hope everything goes well and it will all be worth it when you find the perfect college!

    I have to say I've been in the situation like that so many times and I'm glad to hear that strangers showed you kindness. Unfortunetley when I locked myself out of the house it was night so I had to drive to family in another city to get a spare key haha!

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  10. You are truly such a beautiful girl inside and out- I always smile so big when I read your posts! I totally felt like I had high expectations for this summer, but I recently realized that I had some pretty incredible adventures in Costa Rica, as well as saying goodbye to my dear friends and moving to the East Coast. The past two weeks my boyfriend has been staying with me and tomorrow he's taking a plane back to Illinois, and although I'm sad, I know that he and I have truly LIVED and made memories this summer, like what you described in your post. I know that you will have a fantastic senior year! Much love always.

    Xo, Hannah

    sweetsweetnoir.net

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  11. Oh Lily, I'm so glad you two are on your way to becoming friends again! That's the best. Praying for you both as you grow. Only time will tell <3
    Anyway, another formal dress eh? Don't tell, but I've got about five...lol. We'll keep each other's secret.
    And agreed! We always hope for so much during the summer, but what it ends up is something that falls short. I have so many goals for myself though, and I hope to accomplish them throughout the upcoming school year. Looks like we'll both be busy!
    But we'll always come back. And I'll always make sure to especially stalk your blog ;)

    The Dragonfruit Diaries

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  12. Such a lovely dress.
    xoxo
    Christy

    http://www.am2pmchic.com/

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  13. good luck with this new chapter in your life :)
    I love this pretty dress on you!
    xx
    Here&Now
    Please vote for me to win a trip to NYFW!

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  14. Lily, I so love those golden glittery shoes on you! love love love. and I'm glad you and your friend are working on things. and of course I wish you all the luck when it comes to the new school year.. though you're going to be successful anyway, I know ;) oh and I still hope to see you in the blogosphere as well of course! take care, dear!

    Maiken,
    Maikeni blogi - part of me

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  15. Such a pretty dress, totally my style, love the colour

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  16. Lovely dress - I'm so glad the ranger could help you get your keys out of the car! :)



    Away From Blue

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  17. Always nice to meet nice people among the worst days! You always take very nice pictures! The dress is beautiful too! :D

    Google + / Twitter / Bloglovin


    cassandra xx
    http://backtofive.blogspot.com

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  18. you look like a fairy :)) i love your dress!~

    xoxo,
    rae
    http://raellarina.blogspot.com/

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  19. Aw, look at it this way--you may have wished to do two covers, but the fact that you even did one is amazing. The fact that you actually did something this summer is AMAZING! I know what you mean, though. I wanted to do more than I did, but the fact that I at least got myself up to draw some things that I wanted to made me proud of myself enough.

    But I think you realize that because you lived this summer, just as you said. You lived instead of just existing, and that's a huge accomplishment in itself, one more important than anything else, I believe. Oh, how I always adore reading your writing!

    Your dress is uber cute. I think pastel pink is your color. It's definitely a beautiful shade on you. :) I always want to buy formal dresses but never know when I would wear them so sadly I avoid them.

    PS) I will always be here for you, Miss Lily!! BLOG FRIENDS FOR LIFE. <3 I will wait and wait for your return, and no rush, you've got a life to live, right? ;)

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  20. You look so pretty in this dress. You know what, the summer before my senior year of high school wasn't particularly amazing either.. but it only went up from there. You have so much excitement ahead of you! :)

    xo, Yi-chia
    Always Maylee

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  21. You look so lovely and so as your dress! Love how you paired with your gold flat shoes :) xo akiko
    Style Imported

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  22. You look beautiful, that dress is gorgeous! And for such a great deal! I also love those shoes, but I'm a sucker for gold, sparkly shoes!

    I'm glad to hear you lived so much this summer, I agree. This summer was a lot about growing up and having fun, and I must say it was a pretty great one!

    I love seeing shooting stars, they're so exciting! And I would totally reccomend investing in a zoom lens, they are so worth it! Luckily, I can borrow my friend's but I'm going to get my own soon. They are really nice!

    Francesca

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  23. I'm glad you two are in a better place now. Hopefully with time it will repair itself some more. Also, I would say you had a very productive summer this year! I mean, those 13 miles alone!

    About those photos...that dress was under $15?! what? But honestly, I feel like we are all suckers for bargains sometimes. I have a dress in my closet that's still in the bag with the tags attached...I still feel shame every time I look at it haha

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  24. good to hear that Lily!
    and you look so pretty in the dress!
    xoxo
    style frontier
    visit my shop shop style frontier

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  25. What gorgeous pictures! That dress really flatters you well and I love how you paired it with the shoes. Super cute outfit!

    xx Nicole

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