January 11, 2016

Growing Out My Pixie: One Year Later

growing out a pixie one year later

For months 1-6, see posts below: 
Growing Out My Pixie: 3 Months Progress
Growing Out My Pixie: 6 Months Progress

A year ago, I made the big chop.

I'd entertained the idea of going really short for years (hello 2012 journal entry), but had been too hesitant to take the plunge. What if it looked terrible on me? What if my head got cold? What if I missed long hair?

But once I began poring over pixie cut inspiration photos and exploring online hairstyle simulators every study break I could afford, I knew the big question--what if I love having a pixie?--overshadowed all my other doubts. I at least wanted to know what it was like; if I hated it, hair grows back, and if I loved it, great. Then I could rest easy.

Luckily, I found the cut liberating and empowering. And since I donated my hair, it was reassuring to know that it would become part of a wig for a child with alopecia areata (hair loss condition).

Despite loving the pixie, I let my hair grow out--longer hair was more interesting to style (and disguise on greasy days). I don't regret cutting it one bit, however--the plunge was worth taking, funky growing-out stages and all.

pixie cut before and after

In early June, I decided get a perm to spice things up. I absolutely hated it at first, and even bawled the first night it was done. I was no stranger to perms, but my this time my hair was much shorter, so the result was poodlier and reminiscent of the 80s. Even photos of my hair two months later make me cringe a little...




Luckily, I escaped the worst of the poodle-head stages a few months ago. I began taking a hair, skin, and nails supplement post-perm, which noticeably accelerated the growing pace, even on only 1/3 of the recommended dose. All-in-all, I consider the perm worth the initial ordeal, since the texture has made styling more fun. I've put my faux updo to use countless times.




My hair is definitely in a very different place from where it was last year, and I'm totally okay with that. As a person, I don't feel as if I've changed greatly for the longest time, and that's okay with me too. Individual transformation is much less discrete than a haircut: experiences shape us bit by bit. We're constantly becoming new selves--or are we the same self with updated qualities?

Either way, the last six months have been good to me. College got tougher, but so did I. Friend groups grew tighter, and I finally found my circle. Challenges from all spheres amassed, but with the support of all the quality beings I'm blessed to have in my life--floormates, family, friends from home, and of course, the big guy up above--I tackled them, survived, and may have even enjoyed myself along the way.

There are plenty more challenges ahead, and though my hair may keep changing, I plan to tackle them with the same energy, tenacity, and passion. 

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